How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
