doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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