If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
