dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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