I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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