ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
