she looked like the before picture.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Everclear isn't food dammit
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
