Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
