rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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