She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
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