Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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