My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Randomize
