But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
