I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Randomize
