Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
My life is pants optional.
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