There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Randomize
