oh god the rape fog is back!
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
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