Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
She's just so happy...and so naked.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
