Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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