Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
