i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
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