Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Randomize