And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize