Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Randomize
