drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
