Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(268): View more from Antigua/Barbuda-Carib

she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.

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(224): View more from Illinois

Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....

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(303): View more from Colorado

Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him

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(907): View more from Alaska

I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.

(907): View more from Alaska

I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.

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(319): View more from Iowa

Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.

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(+27): View more from South Africa

I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.

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(316): View more from Kansas

I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.

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(504): View more from Louisiana

I party with great urgency now.

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