Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
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