oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
