i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
