it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
