Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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