its not stalking. its research.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
