Pregnant stripper...not hot.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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