Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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