Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize