He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
