i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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