How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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