just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
