Sponge bath it is.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
