Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Randomize
