So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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