yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
