I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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