Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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