why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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