Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
my liver is dry heaving
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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