That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
