My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
