literally had 100 drinks last night.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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