love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
